Relationships | hacks from a married couple in a LDR
Hello all my singles and those ready to mingle, and hello to my LDR couples! Are you in a long distance relationship and not sure how to keep the relationship going in a positive direction? Hopefully with these 15 healthy long distance relationship hacks, you don’t have to worry about breaking up anytime soon or ever!
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15 Healthy Long Distance Relationship Hacks
#1: Give each other gifts!
This is something me and my husband do randomly. We don’t always get each other stuff because we aren’t the materialistic types. There’s still things you can each get each other that don’t have to cost much. Some things we have gotten for each other are:
- heart shaped pizza for valentines day (oh so cute and literally the first thing he got me)
- old iphone (i never had a smart phone but thanks to him I got one hehe)
- cute clothes
- galaxy buds (i gave him mine because they always fall out my ear)
- letters, handwritten of course…
- also sharing subscriptions like netflix, hulu, etc.
use my referal code to buy from samsung!
Related Reads: gifts for anime lover friends/ bfs / gfs/ etc.
It’s just nice to know you can get gifts from someone and it’s not always a huge deal. It’s just like, oh thank you so much I love you and that’s it. I think if we were bf/gf it will be more of a big deal, so if you’re not married, I think giving gifts to each other is a great way to show each other you care about the other enough to give them gifts that will last long.
#2: Visit each other
We love to visit each other and of course, which couple in a long distance isn’t going to love this? When you visit each other it shows how much you care for the other person. It also shows that you are committed and still interested in the other. I hear with some ex LDR couples that they couldn’t handle the distance and maybe they fall out of love or whatever it may be but I just believe that maybe there was never love to begin with, OR you just need to be in an open relationship. Visiting each other is great for reminding the other that you exist and that’s what is so great about being long distance. You tend to forget the feeling of being with your partner. Once you guys meet again, it’s like the relationship is fresh and new all over again. That’s how I feel when I see my husband again after not seeing him for just 6 months. (The last time I visited him was in October.)
Related Reads: Moving to Cali for 8 months!
#3: Sleep Together!
Who says you can’t sleep together even if you’re in long distance? The first time I slept on the phone with my now husband was when we were talking 3 months into our “friendship”. We just started talking and, fyi, I first fell in love with his voice, so talking to him on the phone was really nice for me because I just liked his voice a lot. It was what basically made me say yes to being in a long distance with him.
#4: Be a diary
I like to tell my long distance husband about my day and what I feel and all that good stuff. Basically I can treat him like my diary. This might not work with every couple, it really depends on how both of you are. If you are a very talkative type like myself, well you might naturally want someone to talk to and to listen to your every day happenings. It can sometimes be a bad thing when you end up talking to your partner about absolutely everything. Sometimes, I will only vent to HIM. So if I’m only venting to him, maybe that can be too overwhelming for him. You have to think about this sometimes. Maybe you can vent to friends sometimes and to your partner other times. It’s not good to give your significant other the whole work load. Still, I think being your partners diary or them being yours can be helpful in keeping the relationship fun and intimate.
#5: Show them what you are up to
I usually send my husband pictures of anything. I even like to share what I’m eating and wearing. We used to have snapchat and send each other stuff all the time, but it has gotten so out of hand. It’s just that, for me at least, I became too addicted to sending him selfies. It would take time out of my day and I would procrastinate a ton. So now we just use discord or skype.
#6: Be there!
You must always be there for your partner. There’s many times where I don’t have anyone to help me emotionally so I naturally go to my husband. I vent to him and just tell him what I’m dealing with. He usually ALWAYS helps me get back to being better. When he visited me recently, I felt that way too. It was like I could count on him emotionally.
Related Reads: what i did with my husband for a week on his visit!
#7: Take them wherever you go
I don’t mean it that way… Take a part of them with you wherever you are! The thing I have that reminds me of him is a smiley face silver ring that he bought me when we were living together in Chicago. There’s so many things you guys can share even though you’re in a different time zone. Here’s just some ideas:
- sweaters, shirts, sweatpants: i have a bunch of his older band tshirts that i wear usually to sleep. i gave him a hoodie recently and him and his family say they love it!
- stuffed animal or plushies: what better way to remind your partner that you’re there than with a cute stuffed animal? you can make one or buy them their favorite one!
- Jewelry: we have wedding rings/ the ring that he got me and its just really nice since I like to wear jewelry
Related Reads: mistakes to avoid as a young couple living together
#8: Make rules and boundaries
The rules and boundaries can be common sense like:
- do not blame the other for being in a ldr
- do not bring up breaking up during a small fight
- don’t break the rules or boundaries of the other
#9: Avoid jealousy
It’s important to first of all, build trust with each other. It’s inevitable to get jealous of the other person if they’re going out and you happen to not like them being around other people while you’re missing out. What does that show about you? It shows that you don’t trust them. Is there a reason for the trust to not be there? Maybe you should continue to the next step in this list…
You must have serious talks. Like I mentioned above, you might need to build trust and talk to the other about why you don’t trust them with other people. The talks shouldn’t just be basic. You have to have quality conversations. You should talk about trust issues if that’s what you’re thinking about.
If you’re talking about the same boring things all the time, maybe you feel you’re not compatible? Maybe you aren’t opening up enough in the relationship. It may be that you both just like being with someone and the conversations don’t have to be amazing all the time. For me and my relationship, I feel it’s best that I’m able to talk, laugh and agree on a lot of things. It’s fun to be able to converse with someone about anything and any type of topic. I want to spend my whole life with this person so the conversations we have will always be stimulating. You should talk about the serious stuff too, I mean maybe it doesn’t have to be that serious since you are boyfriend and girlfriend. Do you both plan on being together for long? Maybe these serious talks are meant to be had..
#11: Build trust
Now you guys must build trust, or else I’m sure you both will fight each other all the time. I definitely have been there with my husband. Even if I was with him in person, I started out watching him and getting jealous if he just saw girls or looked their way at the beach.. That just showed that I was insecure about myself. Most of the time, he was not even looking at them, but looking their way or near them. It’s usually just a misunderstanding. I know he does the same when he thinks I’m looking at a guy but really I’m looking at something else lol
There’s other ways to build trust but I think just talking is most important.
#12: Tell them you love them
You should obviously be doing this anyways even if you’re not in a LDR. I think it’s best to tell each other this every time. You gotta appreciate the time they give you since you guys are making the effort out of your days to talk or skype..
#13: Stalk other couples!
This can be tricky! So something I like to do is look at other couples. Sometimes I just watch cute movies which make me want to message him and say ” I freaking love you I don’t want to lose you!” – me after watching titanic and being sad that he had to be dropped in the ocean LOL
#14: SEE THEM VIRTUALLY!
You need to see them virtually! The most important of these 15 healthy long distance relationship hacks is this one! Why is that… well so you can remember who the heck you’re talking to! Sometimes I just feel in a horrible mood and because I can’t see him, I might message him in a mean tone. It’s better to be able to see them so you remind yourself, why you are being a complete B—-…
Just video call them and you will be reminded what a gem you have miles away.
#15: do the same things!
One of the best things you should do is try out Kast! This is a website where you can watch the same things with other people no matter where they are!!!
Thanks for reading 15 healthy long distance relationship hacks
I hope this was helpful for you and your long distance partner!